I had left our house a short time before the phone call came. My husband took it. The person on the other end asked an insensitive question. My husband was upset-to the point of being physically ill.When he told me about it sometime later, I could hear the pain in his voice.
He hung up the phone. Fifteen minutes later, he called her back and told her how hurt he was by her remark. She said the usual “I’m sorry.” But that didn’t seem to ease the pain.
I, too, have been put off by this woman’s insensitiveness-many times. She is a relative of some very dear friends of ours. These friends are preparing to relocate out of state. The purpose of the phone call was to invite us to a small party to see them one last time before they move. I probably will be going with or without our son. And, most probably, my husband will not attend because of this insensitive question that has been asked.
As God’s children, we are to watch our tongues. Contrary to what we have been taught, words do hurt and we can’t take them back.
James 1:26 “If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a reign on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless.” (NIV)
James 3:5-7, “Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest fire is set from a small spark. The tongue also is a fire a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is set itself on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and creatures of the sea are being tamed by man., but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” (NIV)
I am angry about this. Angry that the thought was so insensibly worded. Irritated that this woman caused hurt to my husband. This hurts me because it hurts him. I am not planning on sharing this with our friends because I don’t want to continue the cycle of hurting others because of our being hurt.
I will have to ask the Lord what to do about the issues involved in all of this.